Beyond Your Doctors

Recruiting Your Support Team

Apparently I realized something that many patients do not. Your doctor is not responsible for every aspect of your care. Yes, they are the star of your team but there are also limitations to what they can do and offer. It is up to the patient to take some initiative. When you get the diagnosis, suddenly you have a team of doctors. In my case I have a breast surgeon, plastic surgeon, medical oncologist, radiation oncologist, gynecologist, 2 nurse navigators and infusion nurses. It didn’t take me long to realize that I needed people on my team beyond the medical professionals.

I am going to share who I had on my team and why I chose them. I am in no way giving you medical advice. This is a list of resources for those it may help.

Here’s my starting lineup…

1. Personal Trainer: With 2 teenagers, a husband and a career, I knew life wasn’t going to stop because I didn’t feel good. Maintaining as much energy as possible was vital. I hired a personal trainer to get me through chemo. Some days I could do a lot. Some days I laid my head on the machine. No matter how bad I felt when I showed up, I always felt better when I left. My trainer was so fabulous. There were days when I had to cancel at the last minute. She never made me feel bad and always had a smile on her face when I saw her. I’m not sure if Mallory will ever know how much she helped me through those 5 months. *No one hovers over you waiting for your machine at the gym when you’re the chick with cancer.

2. Nutritionist: My doctors gave me diet advice but that’s all. No specific options/meal plans/recipes/etc. Thankfully I knew of an awesome woman in our community that had been making meals for cancer patients & had just opened a juice bar. A lot of people (“The Cancer Police” as I like to call them) start giving you advice about what you should and shouldn’t be eating. Leslie had a different approach. She listened to me & asked me questions. She taught me instead of selling me. She gave me tips I could do at home. She wanted what was best for me regardless of how much money I spent with her. She was actually telling me how not to spend money with her. She could prepare juices and meals for one so my family could continue to their normal eating habits. It actually saved me money and time at the grocery store and in the kitchen. She has been a priceless asset.

3. Not only did she help me with the changes in my diet, Leslie has a grasp on reality. She never made me feel bad when all I could get down was Chef Boyardee. And yes, she does long distance coaching. Leslie O’neill, Be Well Meals & Juice Bar, Myrtle Beach BeWellMeals.com @TheBeWellCoach

4. Kona Ice: I know, I’m talking out of both sides of my mouth. I just sang the praises of my nutritionist and now I’m sharing about snow cones. As much as we should be embracing healthy eating, sometimes you’ve got to get through the day. Chemotherapy, well at least my particular cocktail, caused a terrible metal taste in my mouth. This ruined all food for awhile. However, cherry Kona Ice would cut the taste, which made eating food easier. Huge thanks to our local Kona Ice for making sure that I was hooked up with cherry syrup. Kay & Marvin, you’re awesome! @KonaIceHorry

5. Oncology Aesthetician & Makeup Artist: I would love to say that I recruited these two women but honestly, who knew an Oncology Aesthetician was even a thing?! Sometimes you don’t know what you don’t know. This happened to be a case of being in the right place at the right time. I was introduced to Jeanna Doyle, author of Wig ED, and she equipped me for my biggest fear, looking sick to my kids. She taught me how to make brows and a lash line when they were nonexistent in addition to guidance for wigs. She also has an amazing non-profit, Suite Hope, helping cancer patients address the changes in their appearance through treatment. WigEd.com @WigEdTheBook @SuiteHopeUSA

6. Oncology Aesthetician, Candy Hopkin, just happened to be in town to learn Jeanna’s makeup techniques. Candy’s non-profit, HUGS Foundation, works with patients going through radiation. I saw the burns that some patients were dealing with and I was scared. I decided to use Candy’s Brake Method. After 6 1/2 weeks of radiation, I barely turned light pink during week 6. @HUGSFoundation

7. Airbrush Technician/Spray Tan: Yes, you read that correctly. An awesome spray tan tech is priceless. Let me explain. Initially I asked Nancy Thompson to spray tan my extremely white bald head due to the blinding glare, which should have been expected since my scalp had never seen the light of day. Then, I discovered another perk to having a spray tan. During treatment, your complexion can turn some strange colors even when you feel great. It wasn’t unusual to be a little grey. However, when I had a spray tan my complexion always looked healthy. Others assumed that I felt good because my color was good. A spray tan kept people from treating me like I was sick. Nancy also hooked my up with some sparkles to spray on my bald head. Everything is better with sparkles. Nancy Thompson EndlessGlow.com/NancyThompson

8. A home away from home: Living with 2 kids attending public school during cold and flu season while you are receiving chemotherapy sounds like a recipe for disaster. I knew that the possibility of my kids bringing home germs was inevitable. Before beginning chemo I made arrangements with a friend that had an extra bedroom. If someone at my home were to get sick, my sweet friend, Eileen, was prepared for me to come stay with her. Amazingly this never happened but it gave me some peace to know that a plan was in place if needed.

9. Other Moms: Can you have too many mothers in your life? I think not. Before starting treatments, everyone wanted to know what they could do. I had a list of moms that were on call anytime we couldn’t make it to pick up the kids or get them somewhere. If a time came that I was too ill to drive and Reed had to be with me, I needed to have a plan of action in place for the kids. Many of these women don’t even realize what a blessing they were because I never had to make the call to them. What they gave me was the opportunity not to worry if I couldn’t make it somewhere. My kids lives weren’t going to stop. I only had to ask a couple of times but the gift wasn’t picking up my kids. The gift was the willingness of so many moms to be there just in case. I didn’t have to worry about “what if” because I knew they had my back. To Michele, Kathy, Cathy, Julie, Dorien, Heather, Tripp’s soccer team parents and Keegan’s majorette team parents, Thank You! Your availability eliminated more stress than you could possibly imagine.

10. Photographer: I know, I know. Who really wants pictures of yourself at your worst? You may be surprised about what you really see in photographs later. My photographer friend, Katelyn Guild, gave me the best gift that I never knew I wanted. As luck would have it, an appointment that I had scheduled for new headshots happened to be the day after I got called the “C” word. Katelyn and my fab five crew were the first people to hear the news at that photo shoot. Then Katelyn came to “The Hair Appointment” with her camera. And I’m certain that I was the only person to show up at their first & last chemo treatments with a personal photographer. The nurses were probably wondering what kind of diva they were going to be dealing with on that first day. Katelyn took countless photos along the way, many of which are in this book. The thousands of photos that I have of the last year are my favorite cancer gift. Moments with my family, friends and medical team that may have been otherwise forgotten. These memories captured the best in those around me and have shown me a lot about myself. Katelyn, you helped turn something awful into something awesome. Katelyn Guild KaliKlicks.com Here’s a link to her blog about one of our experiences KaliKlicks.com/courage/